Liar, Liar, Pants on Fire... | Amy Wine

God's Daughter, Wife of 21 years, Mom to 3 Teenagers, Dog Mom to 4, Marriage Counselor, Private Practice Owner, and the list goes on and on! LOL! Oh and let's not forget often quirky, sometimes sassy, and lover of tacos. 

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Liar, Liar, Pants on Fire…

October 10, 2019

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Once upon a time, there was a liar, her name was Amy and she told a big whopper to the man of her dreams. There wasn’t even a thought of whether she should lie or not, it just came out, without a flinch, or wonder… the lie just popped right out. It was kept for close to two years after the deceitful day, until one evening a chance run-in with Amy’s father in a bar revealed her lie. Can you even imagine? Yep, this is my life, true story in all its glory.

Here is how it happened, one day I was sitting at a temp job, minding my own business, answering a few hundred phone lines at an oil company (back in the switchboard days, I am that old) and what do my eyes see coming off the elevator, just on the other side of the glass doors… a man in an olive suit, green eyes to match, and dark hair. I was immediately smitten and my first thought was, “I’m going to marry that man” then, my second thought was, “You have lost your mind.” I didn’t really think about that part for a long time after, but luckily for this girl… the client’s he was there to see where in no hurry and he waited and waited and waited in the room with me. Naturally, we started chatting, and I don’t even have a clue what we talked about, not one thing other than the question that brought forth a lie! Eeek!

He said, “how old are you?” I said, “22” and he simply smiled, the convo went on and eventually his client came to get him. Ummm… I was really 19, and he was 27. Uh oh! A couple of days later, I received a phone call from the green-eyed man asking me to go out on a date. Duh, of course, I went. Things progressed quickly and within just a few days we were together pretty much every single day. Boy that sounds like we lived happily ever after, ha, far from it! (stories for another time)

Almost two years later, we had went out with friends to dinner and went to a club to listen to some music. The place was packed, music was blaring, and I was sitting in a chair at the bar minding my own business, when someone (a man) came up behind me and asked in a rather rude and grumpy tone to “hand over your fake id.” My spine stiffened as I knew the voice, it was my father (sidenote: he is an attorney). I didn’t have a fake id and as I tried to explain this to him and boy did he not believe me (for good reason, I will get there in a minute) our voices got a little elevated. You see, my green-eyed boyfriend had not met my father at this point and came over to see what was happening. Yes, Ugh, this was how he met my dad! (insert humilating)

Now, lucky for me, I really didn’t have a fake id and my boyfriend was able to back me up. He thought he was lying, too, but he really wasn’t. The rest of the story… when we arrived there was a very long line to get in. I made sure that when we went to clubs I went to ones I knew the bouncers (had to, remember I lied about my age). This night was no different except it was in the fact that there was a policeman standing behind the bouncer to get in. At this point, my “forgotten id story” was starting to lose its credibility with the boyfriend and I said this, “go in, get your hand stamped, come back out and give me your id.” Now, you have to understand my boyfriend (husband now) is a RULE FOLLOWER DELUXE, he was NOT happy with me, but he did it. I returned to the line and showed, my friend the bouncer, a guys id, with a cop standing behind him and got right in. Whew! This is why he was able to back me up on not having the fake id.

I’m not sure I should have shared this story at this point in my life, but I did promise to “keep it real” and this is about as real as it gets. But hey, I got the man in the end! Whoop!

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God's Daughter, Wife of 21 years, Mom to 3 Teenagers, Dog Mom to 4, Marriage Counselor, Private Practice Owner, and the list goes on and on! LOL! Oh and let's not forget often quirky, sometimes sassy, and lover of tacos. 

I'm amy wine

Hey!

Explore

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